Sunday, November 27, 2005

Issue two


PAGE ONE: This is a one page spread. This page is all text. The page is white with only the faint background of a full figure picture of DR. IMPOSSIBLE laid underneath the words.


Doctor Impossible was earth’s greatest hero. For over five decades he and his allies in the JUSTICE COUNCIL protected the world from all manners of harm. Earth entered a new “golden age.” Dr Impossible based his operations in CORRIDOR CITY and this city was the shining light of the new golden era.

Ten years ago, Doctor Impossible met his greatest foe in battle.

He lost.

Doctor Impossible left Earth and has not been heard from since.

Earth entered a new “DARK AGE.”

Corridor City is the dark light of the new era.

This is the story of what was and what will be.

Pages 2 and 3

This is a two page spread. We see several men walking down the middle of the street in Roman gladiator garb. In the middle is a large, fat man in a chariot. He is being pulled by two large vicious dogs. One of the men in his envoy, is David Gordon, formerly known as Splitscreen. He is now a Prefect.

Walking along the sidewalk on page three is an anglo man in his forties named Hudson Street. He is accompanied by a 14 year old African-American boy named Tysan. They are both important characters whose role will be revealed at a later time.

The large man who is apparently the leader of the guards is named Morbus. He is cracking the whip on the dogs and he yells:

Morbus: Onward Dogs of Hell. To the Green Pagoda.

Tysan: Who do you think there after?

Hudson: If it’s the Green Pagoda, it can only be one man.

Tysan: You gonna do something about it.

Hudson: (with hesitation) No. I don’t get involved anymore.

Page four.

This is a three panel page.

Panel one:

The first panel is an establishing shot of the Green Pagoda. This is a run down tavern in what was formerly prominent district of Corridor City.

Panel Two:

The second panel shows Morbus bursting through the doors of the Inn. We see Sensei off to the side, tending bar.

Morbus: Where are you, my little man?

Third panel

Morbus approaches Splitscreen:

Morbus: Splendid. You’ve found something you’re good at.

Page Five.

This is our standard six panel. Two on top, middle and bottom.

Panel One:

Close up of Sensei.

Sensei: What do you want Morbus?

Panel Two:

We see Morbus and Sensei talk.

Morbus: The triumvirate is coming for the rededication. We don’t want any incidents. There have been rumors of capes organizing.

Sensei: I wouldn’t know anything about that. I try and earn a meager living..

Panel Three.

Morbus and Sensei continue to talk.

Morbus: Fealty, Sensei.. We want your allegiance. Your word.

Sensei: I will not give my word .to a man I don’t respect.

Fourth Panel:

Close up of Morbus:

Morbus: You will now. Bow before me, little man.

Fifth Panel:

Morbus and Sensei stand next to each other.

Morbus: I said Bow!

Sensei: I will make no trouble. But I will not bow before my inferior.

Sixth Panel

We see Morbus call David Gordon over.

Morbus: Prefect!

David Gordon: Sir.

Page six.

Another six panel page. Standard cut.

Panel one

We see Morbus, David and Sensei in the panel.

David is looking at Sensei.

Morbus: Do your duty!

Sensei: I will not resist violently.

Panel Two:

Splitscreen forces Sensei to bow down before Morbus.

Morbus: That’s better. Just imagine, once you were a great man.

Panel Three:

Morbus looks at David and hands him a brand.

Morbus: Brand him.

David looks hesitant.

Panel four:

David brands Sensei on the back with the Triumvurate seal.

Panel Five:

Sensei gets up and looks at Morbus.

Morbus: No trouble. You understand.

Panel six:

We see Morbus and David turn and leave.

Morbus: Come along, Prefect. I don’t like the stench in here. Can you believe him, I will not bow to my inferior. Ha, ha, ha, ha.

Pafe seven.

Five panel page. One panel on top. Two each across the middle and bottom.

Panel One.

This is an establishing shot of an apartment complex. We see Hudson Street looking out a window. We see David Gordon walking below him on the sidewalk.

We hear Tysan’ voice from inside the apartment.

Tysan: Grub’s ready, man. You comin’.

Hudson: I’m comin’.

Panel Two:

Interior of the apartment. Hudson and Tysan are sitting on the couch. There is a picture on the end table by the couch.

Tysan: Hey, that picture. It wasn’t there before.

Panel Three:

Tysan looks closer at the picture.

Tysan: (Surprised) Is that you in the cop uniform.

Hudson: Yeah. Hard to believe I was a flatfoot, huh.

Panel Four:

Tysan is holding the picture shaking his head.

Tysan: You were a cop. You hate cops.

Panel five:

Close up of Hudson.

Hudson: That’s because I know em’.

Page eight.

Six panel page.

Panel One:

Tysan is getting his stuff together to leave.

Tysan: Thanks for the grub. I gotta be getting home or mom’s gonna be pissed. I’m not even supposed to be hanging with you.

Panel Two:

Close up of Hudson. He’s holding the picture now.

Hudson: You get then. And do your homework.

Panel Three:

Tysan is walking out the door.

Tysan: My game’s on Saturday. You gonna be there.

Hudson: I’ll be in the crowd.

Panel four:

Hudson looks at the picture.

Panel Five.

Hudson sits in his chair and starts to look at a scrapbook.

Panel six

We see a closeup of a newspaper article in the scrapbook.


We see a small picture of Tango and the Answer on the paper.

Page Nine.

Six panel page.

One long panel on the top and bottom and with two each in the middle portion of the page.

Panel one:

We get an establishing shot of David Gordon’s apartment building.

Panel Two.

David is taking off Prefect armor.

Caption One: Hard to believe it’s come to this.

Panel Three:

He’s in his long underwear now, holding the armor.

Caption One: I hate this armor. You can’t move in it.

Panel Four:

David is staring to put on his Splitscreen costume.

Caption One: Thank God, I never incorporated armor in my costume.

Panel Five:

The costume is fully on now.

Caption one: If Morbus knew I was still moonlighting as Splitscreen, he’d have me killed on the spot.

Panel Six. Splitscreen leaves out the window.

Caption One: It would be worth it.

Page 10:

Panel One:

A six panel page.

We see Splitscreen swinging through the streets.

Caption One: This feels great. I remember when I started.

Panel Two: This begins flashback. We might want to go with a granier look to indicate the flashback. It would actually be cool to spring for color for the flashbacks which would be an inversion of the typical technique.

We see David as a ten year old boy. He is crying. His dead parents are on the ground behind him.

Caption One: My parents had been murdered.

Panel Three.

We see David being walked out by a detective who just happens to be Hudson Street.

Caption one: They were sending me to the orphanage when….

Panel Four:

We see Dr. I swoop down.

Caption One: Dr Impossible arrived.

Panel Five:

Dr I puts his hand on David’s Shoulder.

Caption One: He said that he knew my parents and that he was my godfather. He asked me to go with him.

Panel six:

We see Dr I talking to David as David cowers in a chair with a blanket on him.

Caption One: He asked if I believed in Justice. Told me I must choose that path and not seek revenge for what had transpired.

Page eleven:

Three panel page

Two panels on top. Then a large panel that takes up half the page.

Panel One:

We see Doc I and David meditating.

Caption One: We trained in his mountain.

Panel Two:

We see Dr I behind David as David is burning his hand with a candle.

Caption one: I made a vow to always seek Justice.

Panel Three:

Large panel of Dr I flying through the streets as David swings through the streets.

Caption One: And soon we hit the streets. Dr. Impossible and Splitscreen.

Page twelve:

Back to the present.

Five panel page. Two on top, one in the middle and two on bottom.

Panel One

Splitscreen lands on rooftop.

Caption one: I can’t believe I was so young. Thank god I inherited my father’s stealth ability.

Panel Two.

He looks down and sees two thugs approach a man.

I can essentially make myself invisible to people’s senses. For a brief period.

Panel Three

The thugs are beating up a man.

Caption one: The triumvirate doesn’t care about the crime on the streets. As long as they get a cut.

Panel four.

Splitscreen jumps between them.

Caption one: This is too easy.

Panel five.

Splistcreen punches them both.

Caption one: I’ve been training since I was ten.

Page 13

Five panel page, Two on the top and middle and one on the bottom.

Panel one.

Splitscreen finishes off the thugs.

Panel two.

The victim leaves and we hear a voice from above and off panel.

Winter: Nice fight.

Panel three

Splitscreen looks up and sees Winter on the edge of roof.

Spilitscreen: How’d you see me?

Winter: I have my methods.

Panel four:

Splitscreen climbs over the edge of roof. Winter is watching.

Splitscreen: Who are you?

Winter: A friend. If your interested. Try and keep up.

Panel five:

Winter dives off the building.

Winter: See ya!

Splitscreen: Hey, wait up. I didn’t get your number..

Page 14.

One panel page.

They swing through the city. Winter is ahead of Splitscreen.

Page 15.

Three panel page.

Panel one

Splitscreen closes in.

Splitscreen: You’re good.

Winter: I’m good at everything.

Panel two

Splitscreen is side by side, swinging with Winter.

Spilitscreen: Where are we headed?

Winter: You’ll see.

Panel three.

Winter is in his arms now.

Winter: You smell nice.

Splitscreen: Thanks.

Winter: You’re gonna need it where we’re going.

Page 16.

Six panel page.

Three on top. Two in the middle. One on the bottom.

Panel one:

They land on a desolate street near a sewer manhole.

Splitscreen: If you wanted to get me alone, I can think of nicer places.

Panel two.

Winter opens a sewer manhole.

Winter: Don’t be afraid.

Splitscreen: We’re going in there. This is not cool.

Panel three.

We see them waliking in a sewer.

Splitscreen: I’m telling you babe there are other places.

Panel four.

Winter knocks on a door.


Splitscreen: You know, babe, if this is a hotel, I’m a little short on cash.

Winter: Quiet!

Panel five:

A slit on the door opens and we hear a deep voice.

Voice: Password!

Winter: The Green dragon rises in the August moon.

Panel six.

They walk through and are greeted by a talking ape named Solovar.

Solovar: Good to see you, Winter.

Winter: Your looking strong Solovar. Been workin out?

Solovar: A little.

Splitscreen looks confused.

Page 17.

A nine panel page!

One panel across the top. Four across the middle. Four across the bottom.

Panel one:

We see sensei and several of his new disciples in Kung Fu robes.

Panel two:

Closeup of Splitscreen:

Splitscreen: Sensei!

Panel three.

Closeup of Sensei.

Sensei: Why have you brought him here?

Panel four:

Closeup of Winter:

Winter: We need him.

Panel five:

Close up of Splitscreen:

Splitscreen: What’s going on here?

Panel six

Closeup of sensei.

Sensei: This is the home of the resistance for now.

Panel seven:

Closeup of Splitscreen:

I knew it! I had heard of a resistance forming.

Panel eight.

Closeup of Splitscreen:

Splitscreen: Why didn’t you ask me?

Panel nine.

Sensei: You are a member of the establishment.

Page 18.

A six panel page. Three on top. Two on the middle. One on the bottom.

Panel One.

Closeup of Splitscreen.

That’s a cover.

Panel two:

Closeup of Sensei’s face next to Splitscreen’s .

Sensei: Is it?

Splitscreen: It is.

Panel three.

Closeup of Sensei.

Sensei: Prove it!

Panel four

Sensei approaches Splitscreen with two swords.

Panel five.

They bow.

Panel six

The fight begins.

Page 19.

A six panel page.

Panel one.

Splitscreen strikes a blow.

Panel two

Sensei strikes back with an elbow.

Panel three.

Splitscreen tries a leg sweep.

Panel four.

Sensei counters with a mid-section blow.

Panel five.

Sensei has spliscreen below him his sword pressed against Spitscreen’s chest.

Panel Six.

Sensei stands above Splitscreen. He has won.

Sensei: You are not worthy. You never were. I will not accept you. I will not train you.

Page 20.

A six panel page. Three on top. Two in the middle. One on the bottom.

Panel one.

A Shot of Winter.

Winter: I will!

Panel two

Closeup of Sensei. He is irritated.

Panel three.

Closeup of Sensei.

Sensei: Very well.

Panel four.

Sensei and Winter talking.

Sensei: You know what we needed.

Winter: yes.

Panel five:

Winter turns to Splitscreen

Winter: Let’s go.

Panel six.

The camera pans down on Splitscreen and winter sitting on a rooftop performing surveillance.

Splitscreen: Thanks, for what happended back there. Sensei and I had a falling out. But if there’s a resistance, I need to be part of it.

Winter: Let’s just worry about our task.

Page 21.

A five panel. Two on top. Two in the middle. One on the bottom.

Panel one:

Caption one: Later that night.

Spilitscreen and Winter look down and see a large holding cage.

Splitscreen: I hear something!

Panel two:

We see two guards escort a chained Bones into the pen.

Panel three.

Close up of winter and Splitscreen.

Splitscreen: What is that?

Winter: Don’t know. But we think it’s powerful. There’s been a lot of chatter.

Panel Four:

Splitscreen: You hear chatter. I’m a prefect and I’ve never heard about that thing.

Winter: I’ve got better sources. I’ll take out the guards. You get that thing.

Panel five.

Winter attacks the guards from above.

Page 22.

Five panel page. Two on top. Two in the middle. One on the bottom.

Panel one:

Splitscreen enters the pen. Bones is sitting. Still chained.

Splitscreen: Hey big guy. You speak English?

Panel two.

Two previously unseen guards appear.

Guards: Intruder!

Panel three

Splitscreen stands between the two guards.

Panel four.

Splitscreen attacks them.

Panel five:

Spliscreen wins.

Page 23.

Four panel page.

Two on top. One on the middle. One on the bottom.

Panel one:

Splitscreen has walked over to Bones.

Splitscreen: Come on! Let’s go!

Panel two:

Splitscreen starts to shake an unresponsive Bones.

Splitscreen: Hey, LET”S GO!.

Panel three.

Bones’ eyes have turned to something behind them. Splitscreen notices.

Splitscreen: What are you looking at ?

Panel four:

Closeup of Splitscreen.

Splitscreen: Uh, oh!

Page 24

One panel page

We see a large troll standing above them.






At 5:19 AM, Anonymous Arik tha Great said...

i like the flow of the story so far, i will probably read it again when it's not 6am, so i can absorb more of it. looking at the char. sketches helps alot when reading the outlines.

hope you guys keep this up, if this book is B/W i would find it weird to do flashbacks in color, yea its a reverse of what is normally done, but i think they would be alittle bit 'way out there' for people.

i saved your blog to my "Favorites" at work so i can keep up with this. keep up the good work.

At 4:33 PM, Anonymous Arik tha Great said...

"Sensei approaches Splitscreen with two swords.

Panel five.

They bow.

Panel six

The fight begins.

Page 19.

A six panel page.

Panel one.

Splitscreen strikes a blow.

Panel two

Sensei strikes back with an elbow.

Panel three.

Splitscreen tries a leg sweep.

Panel four.

Sensei counters with a mid-section blow.

Panel five.

Sensei has spliscreen below him his sword pressed against Spitscreen’s chest.

Panel Six.

Sensei stands above Splitscreen. He has won."

i'm going to assume that Sensei hands one of those swords to Splitscreen, otherwise sensei counters with a midsection blow via sword, which would seriously suck for splitscreen. if splitscreen has a sword, i would expect a close duel with both swords locked together, for splitscreen to get any such sucker punch on Sensei. i hope that makes sense.

i'm going off what i read, its difficult to fill all that in when it's in your minds. i'm sure this was all thought of, and just left out of the outline in error.

At 6:00 PM, Blogger DADICUS said...

Yeah Gary had decided to let me design the fight sceen with illustrations as long as it ends in the way it needs to to have the final dialoge make sense! yeah reading that part seperated sound like Man porn "midsection Blow" "stands above him" "Splitscreen strikes a blow" sounds like dirty porn to me!!!!!!!!!!!

At 6:43 PM, Anonymous Arik tha Great said...

ohh fuckin hell yea!!!!

"Sensei has spliscreen below him his "sword" pressed against Spitscreen’s chest.

Panel Six.

Sensei stands above Splitscreen. He has won."

i think that could be very suggestive to young gay readers. this issue would be a collectors item to NAMBLA

At 12:02 PM, Blogger raidertime said...

i would like to pint out that young gay readers is the audiences reaching for. Hence the rope and lots of man on man sweating.

At 12:03 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hye John,

Just read Script 2. Some commenst. I like it so far. It's good man, exciting.

I don't really like Splitscreen. He's too much Spiderman/Nightwing for me. I like wounded heroes, and he looks too cocky and confident for me.

Why does he follow Winter? To get some action? That's pretty reckless of him. I mean, what if she's a trap by Mordos. I think she should say something to compel him to follow her. LIke reference Dr I or something, like how Rafiki references Mufasa to get Simba to follow him in LIon King.

So Dr I lost a fight and left earth. Cool. I think you should mention that in Script 1, even if it's just a subtle nod to his defeat. Maybe someone says, "You don't have to go" or "you can;t win all the time" or something. Or have some Earth citizens laughing at him or booing him.

Spice up the moment when Splticreen helps brand Sensei. DO they have an exchange. Does Sensei know it's him? And I think Mordos should be proviked into wanting Sensei to kneel. He just shows up right now with demands. I think Mordos should be provoked into it, and when he does it to Sensei, it should be super humiliating. We should feel bad for him.

You know, if tha guy hates cops, and all that, it's kinda silly that he would just put one up. Even the dialogue to it is a little forced. I think Tysan should find the pic and ask about it, so it's more unexpceted by that guy to have to talk aboiut it.

When Sensei tells SPlitscreen to prove it, what is he talking about? Prove that he's good at fighting? And why don't they have any dialogue in the fight? I would interject some words to heighten the stakes. So when Senesi wins, we feel somehing. Maybe Splitscreen could be winning, then is pverpowered. Just make it more than what it is. Right now, it's like "ho hum."

How does SPlitscreen feel about Impossible. Why don't we see any of that?

Good shit thoiugh. On to Script 3.


At 12:04 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh, when I say "that guy" about cops. I meant that character (forget the name) who puts his picture up, where he's a cop.

Feels too forced.



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